I volunteered to help a friend assemble some ikea furniture last weekend. While the idea of assembling furniture seemed like fun in my mind, I quickly learned that the fun would be short-lived in practice.
We went to Ikea, chose out the furniture and transported everything back to the apartment to prepare for assembly. I was overconfident about my furniture assembling abilities, so I spoke very highly of myself. I picked up the Ikea Malm wardrobe closet and commented, “this is the hardest one to assemble… I’ll handle it, since I’m the best at assembling this stuff. Stand back!”
After working for about 30 minutes to get everything assembled I stood back and admired my handy craftsmanship. I inspected every inch of the furniture to make sure that everything looked perfect, but then I realized that the two large front doors were CROOKED. The wardrobe that took me 30 minutes to assemble was quickly disassembled and re-assembled accorded to the manual. Again, the doors were crooked! I took out all of the screws and carefully inspected everything to be sure that I used the right screws in the right locations. Still, crooked door.
I called my friend to inspect the wardrobe to see if the crookedness was visible:
Me: How does it look?
Friend: Good!
Me: GOOD!
….and that’s the end of that.
I mentioned in a past entry that I will no longer purchase and assemble ikea furniture. This decision is now FINAL. I am officially hanging up my “Best Ikea Furniture Assembler in the Continental United States” crown.